Repost Ego

Saturday, January 02, 2010

Ego



Yes I have one.

I don't get along with mine most of time.

I always fall on my face (hard) when I get to thinking I am "so good".

I don't want to be vain, it is ugly!

No I don’t think I am special. I just don’t want to be ugly. ; )

I am my own worst critic.

Pride in yourself can motivate you to try to be better.

Unfounded pride always ends up in the above mentioned fall!

A few weeks ago I stopped at Kum & Go to get caffeine. A nice guy held the door open for me. Then, with my nice hot cup of morning substance, I headed to the check out line. The same nice guy insisted that I get in line ahead of him. I smiled and thanked him but said "no thank you". When it was my turn to pay the clerk said "that the nice guy had already purchased my coffee".  I was a bit shocked and embarrassed.  Translation -I turned 20 shades of red

Once I got to work I thought about what had happened. It was nice to think that someone would see me and think I was "worth" doing that for. (Careful Deb, it hurts when you fall on your face!) So I reminded myself that the nice guy isn’t aware of all my faults.

Then a few days later while picking up food at my favorite BBQ place.... I was waiting for the waitress to get my order ready and a man walked up and started talking to me. I don’t even remember exactly what he said. I thought at 1st that it was someone that knew me but I couldn’t place him. I was so busy trying to place him that it took a bit for me to figure out that he was flirting with me! OH!! good grief I am a dork. I mumbled something stupid, paid for my food and left. Poor guy probably thought I was a stuck up bitch. So yet again, a bit embarrassed. (Yep, you guessed it. 20 shades of red)

Vanity IS ugly. BUT it is nice when someone that you don’t know makes you feel pretty. To bad I haven’t figured out how to handle it politely. I have always felt "sorry" for guys. I could never be the one to walk up to a stranger and initiate a conversation! You would think that at 40 plus I would be able to thank someone for the compliment without making a fool of myself or leaving them thinking "thank god she walked away"!

The older you get the less it happens...... the compliment things......I think I am running out of time to figure this one out.

Yes my husband tells me I am pretty. That doesn’t count. Not the same thing at all. We all know that love is blind! And I am not talking about looking for someone on the side!! I am talking about a person, that does not know you, paying you a nice compliment. (Rude comments do not count as compliments. LOL!!)

Anyway

For all of the of the nice guys out there, I don’t think I am the only dork that can’t figure this out. It did make me feel nice and thank you.

I am vain enough to hope that I get another chance to embarrass myself. Sad isn’t it? Why do we have to have an ego? I mean, really, why....?