Ouch

I am so stupid for waiting this long.  I hurt.  Whaaa!  Tried to run and forget it!  Can't even do the old cow plod.  MOOOO  Big crocodile tears!  Crap, crap, crap!  Good grief I look ugly when I cry.  Stupid ego.
Why would I worry about how I look?  It isn't like there is anyone around to see me.  Could I feel any more sorry for myself?  I am lonely.  Pathetic huh?
I am on vacation and it was a nice day.  I enjoyed it.  I guess I am just feeling sorry for myself because I would rather stick my head back in the sand.  The pain is not going to let me.  Wine helps and it does make me sleepy.  I think I may have to use a muscle relaxer tonight.  If I put it off too long I will have trouble waking up.  I am not taking a pain pill.  I do not like them.  They give me strange dreams.  My dreams bug me enough now.  I know my neck is messed up but I worry because my big toe is numb also.  I know that has to be further down in the back.  That has not been scanned yet. 
So here I sit by myself again.  I have the headphones on tonight.  Listening to Petty and Thorogood.  Move over nice dog, mean ole dog is moving in......  LOL!  Love this song.  Reminds me when I was younger and sometimes had to look for places to sleep.  My dog Bo let me share his bed one night....   That was a whole world ago and a completely different story. 
God I have made some poor choices in my life.  But as a friend said to me earlier today.  Too bad suck it up girl.  So back to sucking it up.  Sucking it up gives me a bad attitude.  If you could see the curl on my lip...
I can only whine to myself.  I am the one that made the choice. 
I need to move more of my old blogs over here.  Way too many viruses and bugs on myspace.  I need to close that thing down.