Find your place

There are so many changes to life.  I don't know how they will all fit yet.  My thoughts are all over the place.  So tonight, after a very interesting evening, I feel the urge to ramble.  I have sat here listening to the same half dozen songs over and over.  Turning it up louder and louder until it can go no further.  The only way I seem to be able to leave any of these rambles posted is to write something about them before hand.  Maybe this one will stay published. 

I am afraid to let go of this breath I have been holding. 


Pull the thread. 
Watch and see what happens to the weave.
Threads floating where they don't belong.
Tie a knot to hold the ends together.
The hole from one lost can be too much.

Gently weave the lost thread home.
Slowly the fabric becomes whole again.
Fold the damage under. 
Do not put it under strain.
Let it rest.



Sing the words.
Let them fill the hole of what is missing.
The rhythm moving thoughts along.
Looking in each forgotten corner.
The beat shaking out each lost fear.

Turn it up louder and louder.
Drown out each doubt.
Where are you in there?
Weep for the lost that is found.
Wash it away.



Feel the hope.
A breath can be held too long.
Things learned in sorrow remain.
Doors closed but not locked.
Forgotten under all of the dust.

The scars are what make you stronger.
Love tied tightly to the heart.
Feel each color of life.
Yesterday remembered to conquer the day.
Find your place.

Fair and Hot

Mattie, James and myself went to Muskogee, OK this morning.  We went to visit The Castle.  The Renaissance Festival was going on and I had never been.  It wasn't a bargain to get in but there sure was lots to look at and take pictures of.

Here is a photo of my youngest and her hubby enjoying one of the shows.

Here is what she was watching.

This was a long build up and two different volunteers to get to this point.  The man balancing on the ball then picked up his whip and snapped off the end of the foam stick the lady was holding in her mouth.  I was just entertained by the fact that he was wearing tights.  I don't know if I could ever get "used" to men wearing tights.  I wanted to laugh every time I saw it today. 

When that show was over we strolled off looking for the next bit of entertainment. 

This large man, that was still trying to get dressed, demanded that we stop.  He was a bit irritated that I moved as far as the shade.  He said he wanted to sing to us.  OH BOY! 

He sang to me and then he sang to Mattie.  I was too busy laughing to get any photos while he was singing to me, but I got a few when he sang to Mattie. 

She had the same reaction to Angus as I did. 

We stopped and watched some belly dancers.  They were good.  I would NEVER be brave enough to do something like this!

There was a parade, that I missed most of because, I was too busy trying to take pictures in the little church.  But there was so much commotion involved, I gave up on the church and caught the end of the parade.

Once the last person involved in the parade walked past I noticed a few others that had been watching from the balcony above. 

I do not know how they wear all that stuff in the Oklahoma heat.  There might be plenty of skin showing but each costume has several layers.  Then to put a hat on top of it all?  I would be a big wet puddle of melted Debbie. 

There were so many people there in costume!  All the employees were very friendly. 

That last photo above was of the "King".  He had the look of a painting I have seen of Henry.  He had the girth for it!  I wish I had been fast enough to get a photo of him before he walked off.  *sigh*

There was a beautiful Peacock that held still for me.  I think he might have been posing.

I love the blue on this bird!   

We didn't stay more than a few hours.  It was just too hot and it was getting very crowded.  I think if I go again I will hope for a cooler day.  I don't know that it will ever be any less crowded.  The festival is only open for a few weekends and it is very popular.  We took the back roads on the way home and I had to take a picture of these old water towers.

The Children's Home that I grew up in had a farm in this small town.  I never visited it so I don't know if the place is still there or not.  I do know there are some good peaches that come out of Porter, OK.  (aka Peach Capital)  I don't remember hearing about any late frost this year so I hope that means there will be a bumper crop later this summer. 

The Wall

It has uses that are often misused.  Good or bad.

It can keep you safe from bad things on the other side. 

It can lock you away from the wonders of the world. 

It can be what keeps you solid.  That one thing that is always there to touch base on.

It can be a barrier that stops you from changing.

It can be a line that you will not cross.

It can be a place to hide.

What happens if it falls?

Was it pullled down to find out what was on the other side?

Was it knocked down to find out what was inside?

Was it removed to make you learn?

Was it knocked down to make you weak?

Was it taken a little at a time so that you could become stronger?

Was it knocked down to leave you exposed?


Leave a path between the walls.

The Back Roads

Mattie and I went to Stillwater Sunday morning to spend the day with Kita.  It took us almost twice as long to get there.  All because we stopped and took pictures of things.

This is not an ordinary dandelion. 

This is a giant dandelion!

I had Mattie put her hands around it so that there would be a little bit of perspective. 

I pulled a few of the seeds off and was going to bring them home to take more pictures of.  But guess what happened when I rolled the window down.  They floated away.  Go figure. 

Then we saw this!  A whole field that was full of several different types of flowers.

I was in heaven. 

I wish my friend Kathey would have been able to see this.  She would have loved it as much as I did. 

Here are a few of the flowers from that field.

It was past the good morning light and the sun was already shining strong.  Some of the photos are so "blown out" with light that there isn't much detail.  I was able to tone it down some but you can tell on the yellow flowers in the photo above what I am talking about. 

Taking the back roads and stopping to take pictures of wild flowers was good.  Spending Mother's day with both of my daughters was even better.  It was such a good weekend. 

Coming undone

Dream heart dream

slow to feel each beat

Coming undone at each seam

release is not defeat

Add texture to each layer

one laid on top of the other
Each and every prayer

all bound within the cover

A simple ray of sun to make you smile
to gently warm a space grown cold
Softly hold the peace with denial
eyes completely open and bold

Find what will move your soul
the thing that draws you in
Shaking off all that takes a toll
do you believe it is a sin

Butterflies & Dragonflies

Great day! 

It was so relaxing to just walk through the woods and listen to the sounds of nature.  I ignored the 3 times that the small airplanes flew over.  Well, except I did have to make a comment about the last one, cause it sounded like it wasn't going to make it.  I also ignored the alarm that went off.  No idea where it came from I was too busy ignoring it.  What I was trying to listen to where the frogs, birds and bugs. 

There were butterflies everywhere! 

(I am pretty sure I could classify Mattie's fingerprints from this photo.)

There were monarch's but I could never get one to land in front of me long enough to get a good shot.  This one landed in a tree and I was able to get a glimpse of it behind a leaf.

This one has to be my favorite.  It is a color that I like.  It wasn't a big butterfly but the color really stood out against the tree bark scattered on the ground. 

There were some really cool dragonflies too!

 Birds, bugs and lizards too.  : )

Everywhere I looked there was something to look at.  Pretty plants and trees all green and blooming.  The wild blackberries have already bloomed and fruited.  Mattie and I snuck a few bites. 

We saw two snakes.  This one in the water, it isn't a good photo but I will share it anyhow.  That way anybody that does not like snakes can say "Ewwww". 

The other snake was in the grass on the side of the trail.  It was barely visible through the tall grass and I didn't try to get a picture of it. 

Of course I took pictures of flowers.  I am not able to resist flowers.

Then after all of that....... here are a few more butterflies.  They were everywhere!

There are hundreds of more photos.  It is just not possible to post all of them. 
I really enjoyed myself today. 

It has been more than 20 years since I was at Oxley Nature Center.  I really hope to go back soon.  Walking in the woods and through fields is just my kind of day. It was made even better since Mattie was with me.  Sharing a love of nature with my kids was one of the smarter things I did.

Have I mentioned that I had fun today?

Cause I really, truly did!