A little flash of memory from my childhood.
This one came from one of the times when we were all staying with Grams & Gramps. I am not at all sure but I think I was about 5-6 years old in this memory. I know Mom was not locked away in the mental hospital yet. I wish I was able to pin point the time frame better. It just isn't that big of a memory. It comes from just a few minutes late one night when I was supposed to be asleep.
My brother, sister and myself all slept in the back bedroom. It was not completely dark in the room because of bright moonlight shining in from the two bedroom windows. I was almost asleep when a noise in the doorway caused me to look that direction. There in the doorway stood a large dark object with several glowing white spots scattered all over IT. IT moved only enough to make me realize that what ever stood there was alive and real. I remember being terrified. What was IT doing there? Was IT going to "get" me or my brother or little sister? What did IT want? What if IT realized that I was awake and that would cause IT to come "get" me first? As I kept watching the white spots seemed to float slowly from one side of the door frame to the other. I was terrified. I tried to hold as still as possible, barely daring to breathe. My poor little heart hurt from beating so fiercely. What should I do? Should I just keep still? I think I must have made a noise as my fear continued to build and build. It was at that moment IT stepped away from the doorway and came towards the bed. I didn't think my heart could beat any faster or hurt worse but it seemed to double its rapid beat. Another step closer IT came. The white spots floating closer and closer to me. It was all I could do to keep breathing and I don't know if I would have been able to run or if I would have just held still and let IT get me. Luckily as IT continued to come closer and closer to me IT finally stepped in to a pool of moonlight and I was able to see IT.
IT was my mother. Standing in the doorway watching her children sleep. I guess when she heard me making noises she moved closer to check on me. She was wearing a blue pant suit that had white velveteen patterns sewn all over the shirt. There had been just enough light to reach the doorway that had caused the white areas on her shirt to glow. My poor little girl's mind had made a monster of those glowing spots.
I don't remember anything past the realization that IT was only my Mother. I don't know if she soothed me or if once I realized there was no danger I was able to calm myself. I guess it is the horrible fear that I felt that made this small moment memorable.
There are other little memories. I will try to write more of them down soon.
This one came from one of the times when we were all staying with Grams & Gramps. I am not at all sure but I think I was about 5-6 years old in this memory. I know Mom was not locked away in the mental hospital yet. I wish I was able to pin point the time frame better. It just isn't that big of a memory. It comes from just a few minutes late one night when I was supposed to be asleep.
My brother, sister and myself all slept in the back bedroom. It was not completely dark in the room because of bright moonlight shining in from the two bedroom windows. I was almost asleep when a noise in the doorway caused me to look that direction. There in the doorway stood a large dark object with several glowing white spots scattered all over IT. IT moved only enough to make me realize that what ever stood there was alive and real. I remember being terrified. What was IT doing there? Was IT going to "get" me or my brother or little sister? What did IT want? What if IT realized that I was awake and that would cause IT to come "get" me first? As I kept watching the white spots seemed to float slowly from one side of the door frame to the other. I was terrified. I tried to hold as still as possible, barely daring to breathe. My poor little heart hurt from beating so fiercely. What should I do? Should I just keep still? I think I must have made a noise as my fear continued to build and build. It was at that moment IT stepped away from the doorway and came towards the bed. I didn't think my heart could beat any faster or hurt worse but it seemed to double its rapid beat. Another step closer IT came. The white spots floating closer and closer to me. It was all I could do to keep breathing and I don't know if I would have been able to run or if I would have just held still and let IT get me. Luckily as IT continued to come closer and closer to me IT finally stepped in to a pool of moonlight and I was able to see IT.
IT was my mother. Standing in the doorway watching her children sleep. I guess when she heard me making noises she moved closer to check on me. She was wearing a blue pant suit that had white velveteen patterns sewn all over the shirt. There had been just enough light to reach the doorway that had caused the white areas on her shirt to glow. My poor little girl's mind had made a monster of those glowing spots.
I don't remember anything past the realization that IT was only my Mother. I don't know if she soothed me or if once I realized there was no danger I was able to calm myself. I guess it is the horrible fear that I felt that made this small moment memorable.
There are other little memories. I will try to write more of them down soon.
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