Last mow of the season?

It is supposed to rain this weekend.  The weatherman says it is supposed to get cold next week also.  So tonight was a good time to get the yard looking nice.  Alex helped his PaPa get the job done.

When he wasn't helping his PaPa he was watching his PaPa.  He really likes the riding mower.

Wait a minute Mom.... Is that the cute girl across the street outside driving her pretty new green car?

 

That is a slick car her PaPa got her!

 

Acceptance

 We all want acceptance but we aren't always good at giving it.  I don't believe that I am the only one that would like to be accepted the way I am.  I realize that I have plenty of faults but I hope that my friends and family accept me anyway.  To feel disapproval from the people you love not only hurts but crushes your heart.  Family is so very precious to me.  I have few that I call friends.  They are all the very best of people.  I watch them try to do what is right and to not compromise their standards.  The important thing to remember is we all have a different standard that we hold ourselves to.  We each have lines that we have drawn that we will not cross.  I think the lines are drawn from the pain that seems to stay with us and it is not always obvious to even the people closest to us. 

An example for me is asking for help.  This is still not an easy thing for me to do.  As a young single mother I was barely able to take care of us financially.  I had a job but it did not pay well.  I had no medical insurance and no money for medicine.  I went to a large well known charity.  The person that I spoke to did not help me.  They were horrid.  They made me feel like a failure for not being able to do these things for myself.  The idiot was even rude enough to point out that if I shared my illness with my children  that would be another example of me being a failure.  To this day, nor any day, for as long as I breathe, I will NEVER give them a penny of mine.  My head knows that this charity is not bad as a whole.  But my heart will NOT forget.  That is a line that I have drawn that I will not cross.  A few years ago the Chief wanted us civilian employees to "step up" and show support for this charity.  I informed him that if he ordered me to participate that I would.  But if I was ordered that would mean he would have to pay me.  I also informed him that I would not give one penny to them.  Not a drop of my own gasoline, not a spoonful of flour from my kitchen and not on cent from my check would go to the charity.  Thank goodness he did not order me to participate.  I couldn't afford to lose my job and I don't know if I would have been able to live with myself if I had helped.

I don't know why that person was "working" at the charity.  If they were a volunteer I hope that found a better way to spend their time.  There is no telling how many other desperate people walked in the door of that charity and received that same treatment.  I was sure desperate and I left in even worse shape.  Not only was my body still sick but now my heart was also.  I had strep throat and by the time I was able to get medicine I was very ill.  My children did also catch it.  I was able to find a doctor that did not charge me the full office visit fee and wrote scripts for all of us.  It took awhile to recover physically and financially from that.  There always seemed to be something like that happening and my budget had no wiggle room.  I worked so very hard just trying to make it through each day.  Most days were successful.  The girls and I were able to make it to work/school, we had food to eat, a roof over our head, and clean clothes.  None of this was fancy.  The clothes came from thrift stores, the food was mainly starch and the "roof" could be pretty scary sometimes.  It was such a rough neighborhood.  I don't know how we made it but we did.  Thank goodness I didn't have to struggle by myself for long.  My husband "rescued" us.  Neither one of us had a "pot to piss in" when we met.  It took us years before we got better jobs and we were able to have a little wiggle room in our budget. 

I watch so many young parents struggle to make ends meet.  I see them having to make choices solely because of the lack of money, resources or time.  I remind myself to be patient with others.  Some days the struggle to just make it through the day is so difficult and the last thing they need is somebody judging them.  If they are doing the best that they can who am I to judge them?  I watch parents with the best intentions make their children feel unworthy.  Not every person needs to have a degree in college and a "important" job to be successful.  What do you think this "child" would be able to accomplish if they felt accepted for what they were? 

My dreams for my children were not their dreams.  I am ok with that.  More than anything I want them to know that I love them.  That I believe that they are good people.  That I have faith that they can accomplish anything that they believe they can do.  I accept them for what they are and that there is nothing that could ever make me quit loving them. 







 

breakfast

Whatcha got there gwandma? 

OoooOooo!  Is that the camera?

Cause if it is then I need to start making faces!

 

How is this face gwandma? 

 

Are you getting this look gwandma? 

 

Are you laughing at me gwandma? 

Make sure your getting this face gwandma.

 

Cheerios! Time to eat. 

Toys

Everything is a toy to be played with, chewed on, banged together, chewed on, turned upside down, chewed on, knocked over and yes again, chewed on.  He is like a little beaver chewing on everything. He has left chew marks on the wooden end table and all along the rail of his baby bed.

Yep. 

He is still teething.

I think we have started a weekend ritual.  Wake up early, eat breakfast, then make faces at grams so she can take pictures.  I did get his faced washed off this time.

 

 

He was more interested in playing with his toys than in chewing on things this morning.  And while playing with is car I guess the striped socks caught his attention.......

It took some tugging.

and some more tugging

and tugging 

Whoaa!  Just about fell over there.  Balance dude, balance. 

and tugging 

 and tugging

Whoaaaaa!  Too much tugging! 

 Bang! Bada Boom! 

 Hmmm...... that sock seems to be stuck.

Back up and back to it.

Are you watching me grandma? 

 must........ tug........ harder...... 

 Success! 

 

Look grandma!  I got my sock off.

 

After all that effort I had to let him play with it for a bit before I put it back on. 

 

Then I had to put his shoes on so that he would leave his socks alone. 

 

 

That boy is stubborn! 

 

Did you know that there is only one reason to put on socks and shoes? 

 It means you have to go out the door.

 That is the only time the mommy, grandma or pa pa put their shoes on.

 This must be the look on our faces when we have to go out the door.........

 Ohhhh!  Wait...... is that my toy box.????

Lucky boy.  He has the luxury of being distracted by toys. 

 

If only his pa pa would figure out how to win the lottery.  Think of all the distractions we could come up with.  :)



 

 

 

The faces of Alex

This kid cracks me up!  These were taken right after breakfast.  I didn't even have his face cleaned off yet but I grabbed the camera any way.  I wish the focus was better but he was moving faster than the lens could focus.  Plus it is hard for me to hold the camera still when I am laughing.

 

Then right after lunch he decided to make funny faces again.  I thought I had his face clean........

 I think there are some carrots left on his cheek......

 

 

He played with the laundry basket once I finished folding the clothes.  It cracks me up how still he will hold when he is completely under it.

 

 

This is him making kissing sounds at me.  Do ya think he could get me wrapped up any further ?